What Would Jimmy Do?

We had our last OTBN outside for the first time this year. The weather finally cooperated so it was nice to enjoy the outdoors along with some really good wine. Both the faithful readers of this blog are familiar with OTBN, but lots of people’s reaction is, “what the heck is that?” when I mention the term.
I know I’ve discussed it here before, but maybe I’ve never explained what it really is.

OTBN means Open That Bottle Night. The idea came from the “Tastings” column of the Wall Street Journal. The article observed that whether it’s the only bottle in the house or one bottle among thousands, just about all wine lovers have that very special bottle of wine that they always mean to open, but never do. So the authors invented OTBN — something they call a world-wide celebration of friends, family and memories during which all of us finally drink that wine that is otherwise simply too special to open. The Wall Street Journal decided that OTBN should be celebrated on the last Saturday of February every year.
We did celebrate our first OTBN in February, but decided it was such a great idea that we now celebrate it the last Saturday night of every month — 12 OTBNs every year!

The Wall Street Journal journalists pointed out that along with opening that bottle and enjoying the contents, come memories of great vacations, long-lost loved ones and bittersweet moments. They point out that wine is more than the liquid in the bottle — it’s about history, geography, relationships and all of the things that are really important in life.

Our rules for OTBN are simple…. it’s just the two of us, we have a snack or maybe a full meal, that special bottle of wine, no TV or music, we light candles and we talk — and — listen. It’s our special time together and our time to really communicate with each other. We almost always observe the ritual on the last Saturday of the month, but a few times we’ve had to move it — I don’t think we’ve ever missed it. The subjects have pretty much run the gamut over the years — sometimes we talk for hours, sometimes it’s fairly short. Sometimes we don’t even talk that much at all, but it’s our time together. Just being with someone you love is special in and of itself — and if you throw in a good bottle of wine, it just doesn’t get much better than that.
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In honor of National Donut Day, I thought I’d attempt to answer that age old question, what came first — the donut or the hole? Now that I think about it, maybe that wasn’t the question… maybe it was the chicken or the egg — but never mind. My extensive research didn’t turn up the answer anyway.
My extensive research did, however, uncover the fact that modern donut machinery dispenses just rings of dough, so the “holes” must be made separately.
Since donuts are simply fried dough, why are they called donuts — the basic donut doesn’t contain nuts. Apparently the original fried dough concoctions were about the size and shape of walnuts, so they were called dough-nuts.
Just about everybody likes donuts — there’s a place in Hagerstown called Krumpe’s. It’s located in the middle of a small alley — now named Donut Alley.

Supposedly cops love donuts. The story goes that when police cars became common in the 1940s and ‘50s, one of the few eateries open during grave yard shifts were donut shops that opened early to cater to the breakfast crowd. Policemen got into the habit of going there for a cup of coffee and a donut.

But one of the more famous writings about donuts came from the Optimist’s Creed — created and published more than 100 years ago in the New York Sun newspaper as follows:

“Twist optimist and pessimist
The difference is droll;
The optimist the doughnut sees –
The pessimist the hole.

A restaurant in Charleston, West Virginia revitalized the Optimist’s Creed’s wording and message in 1929 to what we’re familiar with today…

As you ramble through life, brother,
Whatever be your goal
Keep your eye upon the doughnut
And not upon the hole.

Good advice today — Happy Doughnut/Donut Day….
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I kind of avoid discussions about politics because that subject, like a lot of others, is a personal choice. I’ve prided myself on having never been a Democrat or a Republican. I take the privilege of voting very seriously and have always cast my vote after gathering all the facts possible and voting the way my decision was made.
Unfortunately, for quite a few years now, I’ve voted against someone rather than for someone. But nonetheless, it was my decision to cast that vote. Actually, over the years, elections have probably been won chiefly because most people voted against someone rather than for someone.

When the current campaign for President began, what seems like years ago, I didn’t pay too much attention — like I’ve done in campaigns past, I usually don’t get serious until the field thins out and I start to pay attention to who may become a real “contender.”
I never ever expected the front runners to be Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton — so — now I’m faced with a situation that’s new to me. In all my years, until now, I’ve been able to pick one candidate over the other to vote against.

We probably all know at least some people that are ready to flee the U.S. if either candidate wins. So I don’t think I’m alone in trying to figure out what to do in November. Right now, I’m seriously considering a write-in. The problem, of course, is what do I put in that write-in slot? Some of my initial thoughts……
Ronald McDonald — I know he’s a clown, but what are those that are running? And I’m pretty sure Ronald is at least funnier
Jimmy Fallon — probably not qualified (not unlike the candidates?) and he at least seems like he’s just a genuinely nice guy
A Box of Rocks — I’ve heard it said of both the Democrat and Republican candidates that they are “dumber” than a box of rocks. I’ve never heard a box of rocks actually say anything and there’s a saying that it’s better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt. Ummm….
Riot (Kelly’s Dog) — he’s friendly to everyone, always brightens your day and only sometimes bites…
A Vacuum Cleaner — vacuums suck — that’s their purpose. The current candidates….

Well, anyhow, you get the idea. If you’re interested, check back here from time to time before November — I may update my possible write-in candidates with even more appealing choices. In the meantime, I’ll just hope something happens to alleviate my fears that the fate of the nation and yet unborn generations will be placed in the hands of either front-runner….
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When I was thinking about Friday the 13th and superstitions a couple of days ago, it occurred to me that the number 13 crops up in at least one instance where it’s not mentioned — a Baker’s Dozen. Everyone knows a “Baker’s Dozen” is a group of 13. The origin of the term is disputed, but most agree that the practice among bakers of giving 13 items to the dozen was a safeguard against penalties for short weights and measures.

It seems that throughout history many societies have had extremely strict laws concerning bakers’s wares, due to the fact that it is fairly easy for bakers to cheat patrons and sell them less than what they think they are getting — a serious offense because bread was and is a primary food source for many people.

The Assize of Bread and Ale (1266) was the first law in British history that regulated the production and sale of food. So the thinking is that to avoid the possibility of a penalty, bakers began to include a 13th loaf of bread with every dozen sold. This extra loaf made up for any possibility that the other 12 loaves might be light. Over time, that group of 13 loaves of bread became known as a baker’s dozen.

Actually, I don’t buy that — first off, the practice of the extra loaf originated several centuries before the phrase. Another reason is that it appears that only when the bakers sold twelve loaves, they added another identical loaf to make thirteen. Were they only concerned when selling a dozen loaves? They should have had the same concern when selling 9 loaves — but there is no baker’s nine. And the Assize regulated weight — not number.

Anyhow, a couple of  lesser accepted theories are: that the baker makes 13 — 12 for the customer and one for himself. That way if the batch comes out bad, he can easily find out and pitch it before it gets to the customer. Another thought is the extra item was added by the baker so the household slave/servant would be able to consume one of whatever was being purchased, while walking home with a bag full of food for their master/employer.

What do I think? That the phrase was made up because superstition prevents the number being mentioned by name… probably the extra loaf was baked as a special bribe for the devil not to spoil the batch of loaves.
But no matter — a baker’s dozen it is — when uttering “that number” makes you uncomfortable.
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Friday the 13th. Lots of people believe the unluckiest day is Friday the 13th — some people have an actual fear of the day and won’t travel, make decisions or even get out of bed on that day. The fear of Friday the 13th is known as friggatriskaidekaphobia and supposedly more than 20 million Americans suffer from it. If someone is only afraid of the number 13, they suffer from triskaidekaphobia.

Friday the 13th comes around every year — at least once. It’s possible to come around as often as three times in a single year. In 1984, Friday the 13th occurred three times, and each one occurred exactly 13 week apart. The unlucky days that year were January 13, April 13 and July 13. It’s interesting that in order for a month to have a Friday the 13, it must begin on a Sunday.

No one knows exactly were the superstition of bad luck comes from — supposedly the reason the number 13 gets a bad rap is because it comes after 12, which is considered a number of “completeness.” There is 12 hours on a clock, 12 months in a year, 12 tribes of Israel, 12 days of Christmas, 12 Zodiac signs, 12 Apostles of Jesus, 12 eggs in a dozen, etc.

Friday the 13th has been associated with bad luck from biblical times. Many believe the it stems from the idea that the 12th guest at the Last Supper was the one who betrayed Jesus prior to his death, which occurred on a Friday.

But the number 13 just can’t catch a break — there are 13 twists of the rope in a traditional hangman’s noose and 13 steps to the gallows. In Formula 1 racing, there is no car allowed with the number 13 — the number has been removed after two drivers were killed in crashes, both driving cars numbered 13. Bad guys like, Charles Manson, Saddam Hussein, Jeffery Dammer, Theodore Bundy and Jack The Ripper each have 13 letters in their names. Alfred Hitchcock was born on August 13 (1889) so on Friday, August 13, 1999 would have been his 100th birthday….
I don’t know if any of this is significant, but I might add that there are 13 witches in a coven.

Probably just as many good things as bad happen on Friday the 13th, but then again, why take a chance — a friend of mine believes it is bad luck to fall out of a thirteenth story window on a Friday. Luckily, a lot of buildings don’t have a 13th floor (check the elevators.) Just remember that superstition is foolish, childish, primitive and irrational — but — how much does it cost you to knock on wood?
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Probably not many people have noticed, but I haven’t updated this blog in quite a while. Lots of things have happened in the world and in our household in the past couple of months — some of which I’ll probably mention in this forum, some I won’t.

Anyhow, today is Mother’s Day — a holiday founded by Anna Jarvis of Philadelphia on May 10, 1908. It was made a national holiday in 1914 by President Wilson. Interestingly, Anna Jarvis filed a lawsuit in an effort to stop the over-commercialization of Mother’s Day. As you can probably surmise — she lost. Anna had hoped the day would be a day of reflection and quiet prayer by families, thanking God for all that mothers had done.

You’ve probably heard that Mother’s Day is the busiest phone day of the year with people making in excess of 122.5 million phone calls. It’s also a big card giving day — estimated number of Mother’s Day cards this year is 152 million.

Claire is a mother, a Godmother, a grandmother, and a mother-in-law, so she’s pretty well got the bases covered.
Happy Mother’s day to Claire — and all the other mothers….
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The Presidential campaign is heating up and it seems like politics and politicians have reached a new low. I’m not sure how much being “politically correct” means anymore — at least not with politicians. But I was thinking about how things I used to say and hear all my life have recently become politically incorrect and now everyone (except the politicians) has to be very careful not to offend anyone.

Blind people are now visually challenged, deaf people are aurally challenged, ugly people are aesthetically challenged, fat or heavy-set people are now people of mass. Psychopaths are socially misaligned, crooks are ethically challenged, short people are statured differently.
Minority groups are numerically challenged groups, females are persons of gender and I’m pretty sure a drooling drunk idiot would be referred to as a person on the floor. Janitors go by sanitation engineers, dish washers are utensil sanitizers, farming is exploiting mother earth and a paper bag is a processed tree carcass.

And of course even the politically correct are only politically correct for a period of time….
Deaf became hearing impaired before becoming aurally challenged and blind was sight impaired prior to being visually challenged. Retarded is not acceptable at all, while mentally handicapped has been replaced with mentally challenged. Fat isn’t acceptable — big boned was ok for a while, but the correct terminology is now alternative body image.

So — has our politically correct culture gone too far? It is never proper to use any language when talking to, or about, another human being that would purposely hurt or offend them. However, if these changes in terminology are meant to censor the person’s right to free speech, that censorship undermines American values. I’m not saying it’s happened, but political correctness has gone too far when people become afraid to speak the truth or their own minds for fear of becoming labeled a racist or sexist or upsetting some individual or group. Like any “movement,” political correctness needs to be exercised with a bit of common sense….
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Since the weather has warmed up, our golf group played a couple of times this week. During one of the discussions, the origin of the use of the word “fore” to alert other golfers of a ball coming their way came up. Of course none of us knew any more about the origin of the term than we do about playing golf. I decided as a service to our group as well as both the readers of this blog, to do some extensive research.

Turns out that, as often is the case, no one really knows how the term came to be used as a ‘heads up.’ The Oxford English Dictionary indicates it was first used as a warning cry to people in front of a golf stroke in 1878 and believes it is an abbreviation of the word ‘before.’
I found several explanations, or “stories” that were interesting….
Because golf balls were expensive, early golfers employed “Forecaddies” to stand where the ball might land and reduce the number of lost balls. (This is still done today in professional golf tournaments.) Golfers probably shouted to their forecaddie, who would always be some distance ahead, to draw attention to the fact the ball was coming. In time, this was shortened to “Fore.”
One explanation given by the USGA, is that the term comes from the military battle craft of musket days, when rank after rank would fire fusillades — some over the heads of those in front. Speculation has it that the term Fore! might have been used to warn those in front to keep their head down.
The first explanation makes more sense to me — I’m not sure why golf would choose to use military terms….

Going with the “forecaddie” theory, looking up caddie reveals it comes from the French word ‘le cadet’ meaning ‘the boy’ or the youngest of the family. Adopting French terms wasn’t unusual for the Scots and leads to the theory that French military ‘cadets’ carried the clubs for the golfing royalty in France and the practice came to Scotland. The term came to be used for a general purpose porter or errand boy in Scottish towns in the 18th century. By the mid-1800s, caddie began to be used mainly for those who carried golf clubs. In the early days there were no bags and the clubs were carried in a bundle.

So I’m going with the forecaddie explanation — I imagine if golf balls were very expensive, it was a lot cheaper to hire a forecaddie. I think if anyone in our golf group could hit a golf ball far enough to lose it, we might think about using forecaddies….
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Be Nasty Day is celebrated every year on March 8. As both my faithful readers know, I’m usually into holidays, but I’ve never celebrated this one. I think I know some nasty people, but to be sure I checked the dictionary — nasty is defined as”
• Physically filthy; disgustingly unclean
• Offensive to taste or smell; nauseating
• Offensive; objectionable
• Vicious, spiteful or ugly
• Bad or hard to deal with, encounter, undergo, etc.

So, based on that definition, I think I do know some nasty people. But I still don’t know how to go about celebrating Be Nasty Day. Should you attempt to reform nasty people by turning the other cheek and being extra nice, or should you show everyone your nasty side? Maybe we should all just think of nasty things to say to people, like…. I’m not anti-social — I just don’t like you, or something similar.

Actually, I’ve decided, we don’t need a day to be nasty – there’s enough nastiness to go around every day. So on this Be Nasty Day, I’m choosing to celebrate it by being nicer to nasty people rather than being nasty for the day. I think Buddha said to be kind to unkind people; they need it the most!!
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Today is Al’s Birthday. Al was my brother-in-law, but more importantly, he was my best friend. He is remembered as a true warrior, who fought until the end. He never gave up. He was a man of many talents and many friends. He never told anyone how to live — he just lived, and we’re all better off having watched him do it.

Losing a friend is one of the biggest challenges we face — as the years pass, it becomes less about “what we have lost” and more about who they were, what they thought us, and how we can share that with others. That’s one of the best ways we can honor our loved ones who have passed on — to share with others what we learned from them.

So Happy Birthday, Al! I’m sure you’re having a big party up there today. Have fun, but remember to keep your halo on….
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