Selective Listening

Claire often refers to my “selective listening” and I guess to some extent she’s right. I actually do have a hearing problem, so I don’t necessarily hear everything Claire (or anyone else) says. But selective listening is a a trait I have and the fact is if I didn’t invoke it sometimes, I’d be exhausted.

The problem, as I see it, is this:
Claire (and most of her friends) want to know and share everything — every single detail, before, during and after. The reactions, thoughts, emotions, weather at the time, and on and on and on….
I (and most guys I know) want just enough information to move on the next topic. Frivolous information is just noise….

Here’s an example of what I mean….
This is a conversation we had after I helped Fred work on a repair at the church.
Claire: So how’d it go with Fred today?
Me: Fine.
Claire: Did you get it fixed?
Me: Yep.
Claire: Anything exciting happen?
Me. Nope.
Claire: Any good Fred stories?
Me. Nope.

Later in the day I asked Claire a question.
Me: So are you guys still going to get together to sew on Friday?
Claire: Yea, I talked to Pattie and she’ll be working tomorrow and Rosemary wanted to know if she should bring dessert… she had called on her way back from the farm house and mentioned that I would bring the wine and she wanted to know if I had any vegetables… I did, but the last time we forgot about them and I really wonder if I should get something else for Rosemary… I know Pattie likes Raskel Flats but the only thing I got Rosemary was when we went to Route 5 and knew she collected these crystal things because she has them in a cabinet in her living room. I was going to work on some of the thangles, but I think I’ll finish up the pink quilt…. Patty may be helping her friend Susie, so we may start later… I need to go to food lion because I have to make the chicken salad… Anne called, Winfried wants to know if we’d like to go to Kazu’s tonight? You wanna go?
Me: I just asked if you were going to sew.
Claire: I told you.

Now if I actually listened to all the words, my memory would completely overflow. That’s assuming something more serious, like my head exploding, didn’t occur. So you see, it’s really necessary to invoke selective listening sometimes.
—30—

 

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2 Responses to Selective Listening

  1. Claire says:

    And you always say “You didn’t tell me that!” But seriously, I am getting better about not telling you every detail. The conversation you mentioned above was actually four separate conversations over a period of several weeks. Good job for remembering at least some things! Luv ya!

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