I watched the end of the Masters on Sunday and after Bubba Watson won, he seemed to hug everyone within reach. I’ve noticed that this seems to be a trend lately – not just among golfers, but everyone – the hug seems to be gaining popularity everywhere.
When I was growing up, I don’t remember people hugging so much. There was always the grandmother or great aunt that always hugged the kids of course, but grownups – not so much. I don’t ever remember my parents hugging and I don’t remember friends meeting on the street hugging.
Claire hugs everyone – always has. All her family are huggers. The first time I went to Cleveland, everybody was hugging everybody – at first I thought it was a Cleveland thing or a Slovak thing. But it was apparently just a nice gesture that seems to have caught on over the years in other places.
It turns out that there is a National Hugging Day (January 21st.) Amazingly, it’s a holiday that I don’t celebrate – but you can bet if we make it past 2012, it will be on my list next year.
When we were first married, and away from Cleveland, Claire used to get strange looks because she hugged everyone. Now it’s more of an accepted practice – either that or everyone has just gotten used to Claire. I must admit I was a little uncomfortable when I first encountered the hugging culture, but I’ve grown accustomed to it and find it a rather nice way to greet people. Of course hugs are (properly, I think) used to convey not only greetings, but good-byes, expression of sympathy or sorrow, joy, happiness and all sorts of emotions. I’ve come to believe that a hug is a genuine outburst of emotion. Hugs that aren’t genuine are readily apparent – much more so than a non-genuine hand shake.
There are lots of different kinds of hugs and its interesting to see how different people go about it. A couple of years ago, a lady was house-sitting our neighbor’s house and when I met her and extended my hand, she said, “I won’t shake your hand, but I’ll give you a spiritual hug.” To be honest, I had never heard of a spiritual hug before (or since) but I guess it was a nice gesture. There is the bear hug which is well-meaning, but sometimes painful, the cheek hug, where only the cheeks touch and not many, if any, other parts of the body, the back to front hug, that sometimes comes as a surprise to the one in front. The side to side hug, sometimes used when sitting next to someone or standing in line or something like that.
As nice as hugging may be, let’s face it – there are some crappy hugs and crappy huggers. There’s the way too long hug where you think the hug will never end – they just hang on and on. There’s the awkward hug, when one person is really tall and the other is really short. There’s just no way this kind of hug can turn out good, no matter how good the intentions or special the occasion is. The unwanted kiss hug. I’m not big on kissing in public and I hate it when I hug someone and get an unexpected kiss – I never know how to react. The man hug, when you sort of shake hands and reach out and touch each others shoulders and never make eye contact – not sure why we bother, but it seems “appropriate” at certain times. The lets get this over with hug, when the person hugs someone and barely touches them – probably think a hug is in order, but they really don’t want to. And of course there’s the crusher hug – this person hugs you so hard you think you’ll have to go to the hospital to have your broken ribs taped up…
Hugs are good for you – one study has shown that hugs increase levels of oxytocin and reduce blood pressure. Some of the other benefits of hugging might be: feels good, builds self esteem, slows down aging, helps curb your appetite, fights insomnia, exercises shoulder and arm muscles, its a stretching exercise for short people, a stooping exercise for tall people, its ecologically sound, no special setting or tools required, it’s energy efficient – hugs are good for all these reasons – or – maybe not, but they might be.
Many people do not like their personal space to be invaded, but I’ve observed that a high percentage of people at our church hug. Women seem to be more into hugging then men, but I’ve noticed that a lot of men seem to be more open to hugging after a few drinks at parties.
There’s been lots said about hugs over the years, such as its like a boomerang – you get it back right away. Lyndon Johnson said you should hug your friends tight, but your enemies tighter – hug ’em so tight they can’t wiggle. But my favorite hug saying is: A hug delights and warms and charms, that must be why God gave us arms. Now — don’t you need a hug?
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Both you & AC give awesome hugs