Since it’s the Easter season, it seems like a discussion about saints might be in order. A few blogs a while back, I mentioned that St. Dustan was the patron saint of blacksmiths. Well, that got me to thinking…. no matter who you are, what you do, or don’t do, for a living, whatever your situation, you’ve got a patron saint — whether you want one or not.
The term “Patron” is used in Christian religions, including the Roman Catholic religion, to describe holy and virtuous men and women who are considered to be a defender of a specific group of people or of a country. There is a patron for virtually every cause, country, profession or special interest. There are two categories of saints — martyrs and confessors.
A “martyr” has been killed for his or her Christian beliefs; a “confessor” has been tortured or persecuted for his or her faith, but not killed.
When I looked this up, I ran across quite a few “interesting” saints, like….
If you work in television, or even just sit in front of the TV a lot, you’ve got a patron saint — Saint Clare of Assisi. She’s not as famous or well-known as another saint from Assisi — St. Francis is the real well-known one — the one who’s always shown with all the cute animals around him or birds on his shoulder. Anyhow, Clare started an order called the Poor Clares, but she wasn’t poor to begin with. She had everything — she was pretty and nice, and lively and rich. But St. Francis converted her. He did such a good job that she swung totally in the other direction — she and her poor Clares wore no shoes, slept on the ground and lived in absolute poverty. They had to beg for food. So why is she the patron saint of TV? One Christmas, in the 13th century, when she was old and sick and couldn’t make it to the midnight services, Clare heard singing and saw a vision of the nativity scene on her wall. I’m not sure, but that may have been one of the earliest instances of streaming….
As I said, just about everyone has a patron saint — even henpecked husbands. So if you’re one of them kind of guys, you’ve got somebody to pray to… but he does have a sort of goofy sounding name — St. Gomer — he was an 8th century Germanic knight who is said to have had infinite patience. While Gomer was meek and pious, he was married to a shrew beyond belief. She was mean to his employees when he was away on business, so he had to perform miracles every time he got back to keep them happy. I guess it’s appropriate that St. Gomer is the patron saint of henpecked husbands.
It turns out there is a patron saint of hangovers. I’m not sure she’s the real patron saint of hangovers — but she’s the one you pray to when you’ve got one. St. Bibiana was a Roman female martyr — to the Romans she was “Vibiana.” The best story I’ve heard is that she arrived at her patronage by a silly mistake. To the Romans, she was “Viviana,” “full of life,” but the Spanish pronounce Vs like Bs and it came out as” Bibiana,” “full of drink.”
So it seems no matter what your plight, you’ve got a saint to pray to. That’s good — I’ve heard that prayer is a wine that makes glad the heart of men….
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