Almost 50 years ago when Claire and I decided to get married, we made a trip to Cleveland so I could meet the family. We weren’t aware of it at the time, but the family had planned a surprise party for us — the party was at Bernie and Ed’s house. So Bernie was one of the first Stracensky’s to welcome me to the family.
Over the years, Bernie and Ed visited us in Virginia more than any of the other family members. They’d come down for just the weekend sometimes and occasionally they stayed longer. I always went through a similar routine with Bernie after they had arrived…. I’d always ask if they had a good trip, and Bernie always said, “Oh, it was very nice.” Then I’d say something like “did you hit any rain?” And Bernie would respond, “I’m really not sure.” This would go on for a little while and I’d always ask if the construction on the Pennsylvania Turnpike was as bad as ever. Again, Bernie’s response was pretty much always, “I’m not really sure.” It turns out that Bernie slept all the way to Virginia. Ed did the driving, and Bernie took a nap! So she never developed the hatred for the Pennsylvania Turnpike most of us did.
They always brought us some good Cleveland bread, because Virginia just didn’t have good bread. And Bernie always brought one or two or three of her world famous nut rolls. Bernie was known for many things, but she might have been most famous for her nut rolls. Ed once told me that he’d heard that Bernie made just about the best nut rolls of anyone. I looked a little puzzled when he told me that, and he explained that he was only allowed to eat the ends of her nut rolls — the good part was always saved for other people. I don’t know if that’s really true or not, but that was Ed’s story, and he stuck to it.
Bernie was the teacher in the family. Every time I was around her and said or did something kind of stupid, which happened fairly often, Bernie would always say, “Jimmy, when my children (meaning her students) say or do something like that I always tell them….” and it would usually be something like it was inconsiderate or might be offensive to some people, or something like that. Always made me think I should hang my head and say, “yes, Mrs. Hudak.” She never seemed to get too far from her teaching mode…
Life is basically what happens from a time called birth to a time called death. That’s all we get — life itself. There aren’t even any instructions — it’s left up to us to do the living. Like everything else, some of us do a better job than others. I was thinking a few days ago, that Bernie did a pretty good job.
She pursued a noble profession — teaching, and influenced a lot of people over the years. She met, and loved her soul mate for many, many years, raised three pretty great kids in Rusty, Mark and Peggy and had untold friends. She also got to spend a good number of years enjoying her grandchildren. Overall, I’d say she had a good, long life.
The last time we visited with Bernie, near the end, she seemed sad. See, that’s the thing — the truth is, there are no happy endings. Endings are the saddest part. So that leaves us with a happy middle and a very happy start. I think Bernie achieved that.
We’re all going to be a little sadder around here, but there’s gonna be a big party in Heaven. Bernie and Eddie together again — just like old times. I’d even be willing to bet that Bernie will let Ed have some of the “good part” of her nut rolls this time….
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