What Would Jimmy Do?

Argumentative, contrary, combative, confrontational, quarrelsome, cantankerous, scrappy — these words all describe people that are quick to argue. We all know people that one or more of these words would describe. Some people just like to argue and trying to have a conversation with a person that just enjoys arguing or who believes they are always right can be, at the very least, frustrating. I know several people that just seem to enjoy an argument and a couple that must always be right. After a rather frustrating “discussion” recently, I started to think about why some people are that way and how I usually handle my interaction with them. And then I got to thinking — how should I handle the situation(s) — what’s the best way?

There’s an old saying — never discuss politics or religion at dinner. Well, those subjects certainly are hot buttons for disagreement, but my philosophy is it’s usually not good to discuss any controversial subject during meals. But when you’re around certain people, just about any subject can become controversial. There are some obvious actions (and non-actions) that you can use to help control the situation. Keep calm — getting angry is of no benefit. Consider why you’re arguing — is it even worth arguing about? Consider your relationship with the person — is it worth losing a friend over? Events change every day, but good friendships should be lifelong. Listen well — really listen to the other person, maybe they do have a valid argument.

One of the things that I haven’t mastered, but I’ve gotten better at is my willingness to walk away from arguments. It can be difficult to walk away from things when someone you care about disagrees with you on an important issue. I read somewhere that a peaceful silence is always preferable to a contentious victory. As I’ve aged, I’ve come to realize that friendship is more important than agreement.

I’ve learned to take people in pieces — I enjoy being with some people some of the time and I accept that some subjects will do nothing but set them off on an emotional argument. So I’ve become very careful who I argue with. Someone said it best — discussion is an exchange of knowledge; an argument an exchange of ignorance.
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A few days ago, we attended an Aging Workshop at the local university. It was an all-day session and I must admit that I was disappointed in much of the presentation — not that it was bad, it just wasn’t what I had expected or was hoping for. Aging isn’t something that I think about much, but during some  of the “lulls” at the workshop I got to thinking about different aspects of aging.

All through a lot of my life, in any given group I wasn’t the oldest, I was always the youngest. I was the youngest in my first grade class and the youngest in my high school graduating class. During my high school years, I was the youngest business man in Maysville, Oklahoma (I owned and ran a snow cone business.) The first few jobs I had after college, I was always the youngest in the office. Of course, over the years that began to change… even though sometimes I don’t act like it, now I am almost the oldest person I know.

I am thankful that I’ve experienced so many things — some wonderful, some very bad. I’m sorry that I’ve wasted so much time. I’m sorry that I’ve traveled so extensively and still only speak English. I’m sorry that I didn’t meet Claire earlier in my life. My reactions are slower, my eyesight is declining, people’s names (more) often elude me and my energies must be used wisely. But even so, I often feel full of energy and not at all “old.”

Andy Rooney once said, it’s paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn’t appeal to anyone. I guess that’s probably true, but there’s only one alternative to getting old — so suck it up!
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I’ve mentioned several times here that this time of year is always busy around here. The Kentucky Derby ( and the Gold Cup for you Virginians), Cinco De Mayo, our Anniversary, Kelly’s Birthday and Mothers’ Day all occur within about a week. We didn’t go to the Kentucky Derby (or Gold Cup) but I watched it on TV. Cinco De Mayo turned out to be special — we didn’t go out as usual, but Claire made Mexican and we modified our favorite Margareta recipe a bit and we both decided it was a big improvement. We took a couple of days for a short trip to southern West Virginia. We visited the Greenbriar, had some drinks and snacks at the golf course (home of the Greenbriar Classic, coming up in about 50 days) attended a pretty impressive demonstration by a very talented glass blower, generally bummed around the grounds and had a nice dinner. The Greenbriar Valley has lots going for it. We spent a good part of a day around Lewisburg — a place that calls for another visit in the future. We had a great visit with the folks at the Smooth Ambler distillery — an up-and-coming distillery that I’m sure you’re going to hear more and more about as time goes on. Their operation is very small, but their spirits are already available in 26 states and several foreign countries. We did a lot of “tasting” and got a personalized tour. I even got to bottle my own bourbon and sign the label. Weather was good and the drive was beautiful — a really good trip…

Not sure of all the details of Kelly’s birthday, but I know they got to watch the fly-over of the World War II aircraft at the National Mall and visited the Air and Space Museum at Dulles for a closer look at the planes… and Kelly and Chris attended the Caps playoff game on Mother’s Day.

All in all a busy but really good week. Of course the best part was that I got to spend the time with my secret love… since it’s a secret, I won’t say much more, but I’ll give you a hint — her first name starts with Claire…..
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Happy Mother’s Day to the three best Moms I know.

They have all raised, or are raising, perfect kids.

Happy Mother’s Day Claire, Kelly and Chassie!!!
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I was in a meeting the other day and the term “maintenance philosophy” was used. That got me to thinking about philosophy in general. I remember taking a philosophy course in school and I remember it didn’t make much sense to me. I also remember taking a course on the history of science and it seems that there often wasn’t a clear cut line between the early philosophers and scientists — maybe there still isn’t. Seems like all the great minds, both scientists and philosophers, have always grappled with questions like, Who am I? Why am I here? Where did I come from? Where am I going?

Actually, these questions are all part of a bigger question — how is the best way to live? All sorts of people have pondered the best way to live just about forever, but recently the amount of information available to us has made it difficult to even think about it, much less philosophize about it.

Whether we realize it or not, we all have our own personal philosophy or our own “rules of life.” These rules, and we all have them, are based on our environment, our upbringing, and our own personal beliefs. Every day we make decisions based on our own set of rules. We decide what to wear, what to eat, what jobs to do, whether to take an umbrella when we go out — all sorts of things. These decisions are are determined by your rules of life — your personal philosophy.

Your personal philosophy, whether you can articulate it or not, is what it is. Your beliefs have been formed and some of them can and do change and co-exist with all your other beliefs within that philosophy. A philosophy is a way of life. I noted earlier that the amount of information readily available to us has changed the way we approach things. Today, it’s so much easier to just google it than to think about it. Maybe should all do a little less googling and a little more thinking….
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Here I go wading in on something I don’t have all the facts about and I know it’s a sensitive subject that most or all people have an opinion. Freddie Gray died under mysterious circumstances while in police custody. During, or just after his funeral, “protestors” set fires, and attacked merchants, journalists and police — looted and burned. These “protesters” are in fact thugs and hooligans, according to the Mayor of Baltimore. Gray’s mother, Gloria Darden, said, “Don’t tear up the whole city just for him. That’s wrong.”

I think we all agree that a lot of questions surround the man’s death. It’s not really clear why he was arrested in the first place. Apparently he wasn’t committing a crime and was not wanted by police.
Just about the time of Gray’s funeral, Loretta Lynch was being sworn in as the nation’s first black female attorney general. She immediately said that the Justice Department stood ready to provide any assistance that might be helpful. Of course a Justice Department probe will not necessarily result in conclusions that support the suspicions of the “protesters.”

Rev. Martin Luther King said, “A riot is the language of the unheard.” Riots are, and have always been, a method that the oppressed use to make their frustration known — apparently hoping that their actions will convince those in power to respond to their needs/frustrations. Some believe that the inability to articulate their frustration results in the throwing of rocks, looting and setting fires. To me, and lots of other people, these actions make no logical sense and are self-defeating.

As I indicated previously, I obviously don’t know all the facts about Gray’s arrest and death and I don’t know all the facts that led to the disruptions in Baltimore. I’m not even sure the events were related in some instances. I believe in the American right to express one’s opinion and to protest, but I have little use for thugs and vandals that use peaceful protests as an excuse for violence.

President Obama said that those responsible for the Baltimore violence “need to be treated as criminals.” Treating them as criminals seems to be right on target to me — that’s what they are.
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We went to a party yesterday — Emily was excited that we were going, but when she found out it wasn’t a “Frozen” party, she lost her enthusiasm. Anyhow, the party was to celebrate the 40th anniversary of our pastor, Fr. Mat Rowgh, being ordained as a priest.

Religion is a personal thing and how, when and where you choose to worship is a personal choice. I’ve talked to people that don’t go to a particular church because they don’t like the building or there isn’t enough parking or the services aren’t held at a convenient time — or some other reason. A church, like other organizations — only more so, isn’t the brick or siding, paved or unpaved parking, or location — it’s the people — and — it’s leaders.

When we moved to West Virginia, we looked around to decide where we thought we wanted to go to church. From our house, we had several obvious choices but when we visited St. Agnes the choice was obvious — and easy.

I read somewhere that the first 12 minutes in a church dramatically influences whether you’re coming back or not. It didn’t take anywhere close to 12 minutes for us — Fr. Mat made the decision easy.

It occurred to me that as everyone in that crowded room yesterday was (rightfully) congratulating Fr. Mat, we probably all should have been offering him an apology, or at the very least feeling a little guilty. I’m afraid most of us only think of Fr. Mat as the true Shepherd that he is. We forget that he has his own problems — probably because he is so good at putting his own situations aside and making us feel as though we matter more to him than anything else. When we call when he’s busy (he always is) he never tells us to call back. When we suffer the loss of a loved one, when we have trouble in our lives or homes, when we are sick…. he’s always there.

So I think I speak for the entire St. Agnes community when I say, Congratulations, Fr. Mat but, more importantly, Thank You! And thank God for His gift that we have in you.
Happy Anniversary!!
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Today, April 24th is a very significant day. Well yea, you probably say, thinking that today you can buy an Apple Watch. The release of Apple Watches is significant, but that’s not what I was thinking of.

Twenty five years ago today, April 24, 1990, the Hubble Space Telescope was launched on the Space Shuttle Discovery.

Long, long ago, man looked at the heavens with the naked eye, and even with only his eyes, figured out a lot about the stars and planets and their movements. Galileo came along and invented the telescope, and the search for knowledge about outer space was on. They were able to figure out how many planets make up our solar system, which ones have moons, see the rings around Saturn and map galaxies like the Milky Way.

The telescopes got better with time being built larger and more sophisticated and accurate. In the 1920s, astronomer Edwin Hubble used the largest telescope at the Mt. Wilson Observatory in California to search for galaxies, planets and stars within our Solar System. To honor his significant contribution to the field os astronomy, the Hubble Space Telescope was named after him.

Since its launch, Hubble has circled the Earth along a circular low earth orbit 340 miles in altitude and traveled more than 3 billion miles. It has made more than 1 million observations since its mission began in 1990. The telescope has the accuracy of .007 arc seconds, which is like being able to shine a laser beam on a dime 200 miles away and operating outside the haze of our atmosphere, it can see astronomical objects with an angular size of 0.05 arc seconds — that’s like seeing a pair of fireflies in Tokyo from Washington D.C. Hubble weighs 24,500 pounds (as much as two full-grown elephants) and is 43.5 feet long — the length of a large school bus.

Hubble has peered back into the very distant past, to locations more than 13.4 billion light years from Earth. Let’s see the Apple Watch do that. Happy Birthday, Hubble!!
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I personally think just about every day is a good day to celebrate with wine, but today, April 17, is a day we should all celebrate by tipping a glass.

Today is Malbec World Day. I’m not sure why it’s not World Malbec Day, but there’s probably a good reason for it — maybe it’s an Argentinean thing, since they’re the ones that came up with it.

In the last couple of years, Malbec has become our wine of choice. Apparently, we’re not alone because it has become one of the more popular and best selling wines recently. A lot, if not most, Malbec comes from Argentina and it’s popularity seemed to rise just about the time the first Argentine Pope, Pope Francis, came along.

Even after extensive research I wasn’t able to determine why April 17 is Malbec World Day and not World Malbec Day, but I did discover that on April 17 in 1853 the 7th President of Argentina, Domingo Faustino Sarmiento decided to make it his mission to transform the Argentinian wine industry. He asked Michel Aime Pouget, a soil expert from France, to import grape vines for him. In the selection of vines was Malbec. It turns out that the Malbec grape thrived in the Argentine climate.

Even though Malbec was growing in popularity, Malbec World Day didn’t come into being until 2011. Apparently the first one was a huge success and this, the fifth one, promises to be even more successful as this will be the first officially celebrated by us. Luckily, April 17 was free on our calendar for such an important holiday — I have a feeling this may move right up my list of favorite days, maybe even getting close to Talk Like a Pirate Day.

Cheers and Happy Malbec World Day!
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I get a message from NASA when the International Space Station is going to be visible from our house. Often, especially in good weather, I go out and watch it. The other night after it had passed, I was looking at the sky and started thinking about the stars and how when we lived in the Philippines we saw the Souther Cross — something we can’t see in the northern hemisphere. I can identify and find some starts and constellations, but really not too many. The sky seems to change with the stars moving around, but of course this is because we’re standing on the earth that is spinning and it appears that the sky is revolving around us.

But one star doesn’t appear to move — the North Star. The North Star, known as Polaris, looks like it’s glued in place. If you can locate Polaris, it’s always in the north. If you happen to be lost, you can always at least know which direction to head by finding Polaris. (Again, this only works if you’re in the northern hemisphere.)

The North Star is easy to find if you can locate the Little Dipper. The North Star is located at the end of the handle in the Little Dipper. Most people think Polaris is a very bright star —it’s not. It’s only about “average” in brightness. In fact, it’s usually hard to see from our house and we don’t have a lot of ambient light out where we live. It seems like such an important star that’s been used for navigation for so long should be bright — but it’s not.

I guess we should all strive to be more like Polaris — if you think about it, it teaches some valuable lessons. There’s a lot to be said for being dependable and always there when needed. And you don’t have to be the brightest to be important. In any given situation, it’s usually an “average” person that’s the most important….
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